Me and Isabel matched on Hinge yesterday. I converted it to ig and texted her that I was free the following day if she was up for it. She was, and we ended up booking a date at 7:30pm at SPÖN, a wine bar in Newtown. Then we went to The Courthouse Hotel (aka Courty) for two more drinks.

Like I said, we have moments that felt very effortless and fun, and some that felt a bit forced. Or you could also call it fun / nice silences. We looked into each others eyes and the tension built a little. Probably pretty normal, and should not be overanalysed.

She lives really close to me, so we took the same bus home and when we get out it’s POURING rain. The sky had just opened up, it felt like it came from out of the blue.

We buck it to the wall of the building that is sheltered by these sun / rain roofs. And start walking. Some spots are not as covered so we hurry up at those parts and then we reach this point where there is a good bit that is just exposed to all of the rain. She suggest we wait it out. I get a bit closer and say something along the lines of me kind of wanting to kiss her. She says ”yea?” and… well, I do.

...

Then we stop and she looks up at me and asks, quite deadpan may I add, why I’m smiling. I say I had a good time, and that this was quite a good way of waiting out the rain. I kiss her again a bit, but then we get moving. I kind of feel like she wants to get going. She is having quite the pace.

Also she’s been saying how she has roommate, has class at 8 (and she is a morning person that goes to bed early) and how the rain ruins her hair. I’m not really feeling like we’d be going home to anyone’s. (None of the forementioned are really compatible with that, are they?)

We come to an intersection where I will keep going and she is to cross. She says ”I just want to wait under here til it gets green so I can cross”. She does that with a bit of distance, I feel like. Then it turns green, and from our of nowhere she just dashes across the street. And there I am without a goodbye or anything.

I don't want to be just left there, so I walk home, kind of looking back after a few meters but at that point I don’t see her or where she went. This was a weird ending… Like: did I do something she was uncomfortable with? I felt like she was very much giving consent, but I also feel like that's very much the type of bs statement you hear people say when they are clueless.

I go home and my roommates Marcus and Grace are up. YESSS! (I also talked to Grace how I was going on this date so) TIME FOR DEBRIEF. First thing she says to me is ”how was the date?”. "Aeeh, it was alright?" I respond.

I run them through the whole thing and how I’m really confused. I’m guessing she just didn’t want to take it any further and felt that the night was over. ”But don’t you say that then?” asks Marcus. And yes, probably…

Then I look at my phone and see:

40min ago:

Isabel: ”where tf did you go?”

14min:

Isabel: ”alright damn”

(Editors note: yes she is one of those gals with auto cap turned off)

I’m not going to bother going through the rest of our convo. That I’ll leave for our FaceTime calls.

But to finalise. Definitely weirdest dating experience I’ve had, and now I kind of feel like it’s my fault… I should’ve just chilled and stood there waiting to see if she really just ran away from me instead of trying to save face by. keep walking… but at the same time her use of ”I” felt too strong for her not to realise I did not live in that direction…

Well I guess I’ll remember this one.. I’m not even sure what I’m bummed out about… well I guess it’s just the very unsatisfactory ending of not even saying goodbye…

Here I am up way past bedtime now typing all this out. My seminar with Emanuela starts in 8h 22min…

Guess I have a great example of miscommunication for my intercultural communication seminar tomorrow…

It is interesting because I felt bad when I thought she was the one just walking away on me, but not too bad, but I could deal with that quite well. But now when I know she thinks I did that to her I feel way worse… it’s interesting.

Good night